Estate Planning for Women

While estate planning is important for everyone, women especially need to understand estate planning and have a plan of their own in place. Here are some issues that are of particular interest to women and their estate planning.


Incapacity. Because women, on average, live longer than men, there is an increased need to plan for physical and/or mental incapacity that can occur in later years. Long-term care insurance, purchased in advance, can help cover these costs and can even help women remain in their homes for as long as possible. It is also important to plan now to prevent the court from taking control of finances and of personal care at incapacity. At a minimum, durable powers of attorney (for both assets and health care decisions) are needed. A revocable living trust provides excellent protection for assets at incapacity and contains distribution instructions at death.


Children, Grandchildren, Parents and Pets. Those raising minor children need to name a guardian in their will; otherwise, a judge will decide who will raise them without your input. Provisions need to be included for aging parents, a child or relative with special needs, pets and other dependents. (Special planning can provide needed care without jeopardizing valuable government benefits.) Additional life insurance may be needed to provide for these loved ones. A gifting program or trust can provide for the education of grandchildren and future generations.


Charitable Causes. Those who want some or all of their assets to go to a favorite charitable, religious or educational organization must include this in their estate planning. Without a valid plan in place, assets will be distributed by state law—and a charity will not be among the heirs. Also, proceeds from a life insurance policy can be used to fund various types of charitable giving at your death.


Protecting a Business and Other Assets. Professional women in medicine, law and real estate must be concerned about protecting their assets from lawsuits. Many women are also business owners, and they need to plan for what will happen to their business when they are no longer involved due to incapacity, retirement or death. Asset protection planning and business succession planning can and should be included in the estate planning process.


Married Women. Women who marry tend to choose husbands who are older, which means they are likely to become widowed. Without proper estate planning while married, many will see their standard of living reduced during their retirement years. Those in second marriages need estate planning that provides for the surviving spouse but does not disinherit children from a previous marriage. Also, because most married women survive their husbands, they often have final say over who will ultimately receive the couple’s assets. Women must take an active role in the couple’s estate planning. Knowledge is key—an unknowledgeable widow will likely be confused and uncertain, while one who has participated in the planning process will more easily understand it and even feel empowered.


Unmarried Women (Never Married, Divorced and Widowed). Without valid instructions, state law will apply and that means friends, charities and unmarried partners will not be among your heirs. On the flip side, if you are divorced or separated, you need to update documents (including beneficiary designations) as soon as possible to prevent your ex from making life and death decisions for you or inheriting your assets.

5 Common Estate Planning Mistakes to Avoid

From time to time, it’s good to review why having a complete, up-to-date estate plan is so important. In addition to confirming our own actions, it can provide us with valuable information to pass along to friends and family who, for whatever reasons, have yet to act. So, here are five common estate planning mistakes to avoid.

1. Not having a plan. Every state has laws for distributing the property of someone who dies without an estate plan—but not very many people would be pleased with the results. State laws vary, but generally they leave a percentage of the deceased’s assets to family members. (Non-family members, like an unmarried partner, will not receive any assets.) It is common for the surviving spouse and children to each receive a share, which often means the surviving spouse will not have enough money to live on. If the children are minors, the court will control their inheritances until they reach legal age (usually 18), at which time they will receive the full amount. (Most parents prefer their children inherit later, when they are more mature.)

2. Not naming a guardian for minor children. A guardian for minor children can only be named through a will. If the parents have not done this, and both die before the children reach legal age, the court will have to name someone to raise them without knowing whom the parents would have chosen.

3. Relying on joint ownership. Many older people add an adult child to the title of their assets (especially their home), often to avoid probate. But this can create all kinds of problems. When you add a co-owner, you lose control. Jointly-owned assets are now exposed to the co-owner’s creditors, divorce proceedings and possible misuse of the assets, and the co-owner must agree to all business transactions. There could be gift and/or income tax issues. And if you have more than one child but only name one to be co-owner with you, fluctuating values could cause your children to receive unbalanced/unintended inheritances.

4. Not planning for incapacity. If someone cannot conduct business due to mental or physical incapacity, only a court appointee can sign for this person—even if a valid will exists. (A will only goes into effect after death.) The court usually stays involved until the person recovers or dies and the court, not the family, will control how their assets are used to provide for their care. The process is public and can become expensive, embarrassing, time consuming and difficult to end.

Giving someone power of attorney as a way to avoid the court process can be risky because that person can do anything they want with your assets with no real restrictions. For this reason, a living trust is often preferred for incapacity planning. With a trust, the person(s) you choose to act for you can do so without court interference, yet they are held to a higher standard as a trustee; if they misuse their power, they can be held accountable.

Someone also needs to be given the power to make health care decisions for you (including life and death decisions) if you are unable to make them for yourself. Without a designated health care agent, you could be kept alive by artificial means for an indefinite period of time. (Remember Terri Schiavo? Terri’s story and information about the Terri Schiavo Foundation can be found at, ) The exorbitant costs of long term care, most of which are not covered by health insurance or Medicare, must also be part of incapacity planning. Consider long term care insurance to protect your assets.
5. Not keeping your plan up to date. Every estate plan is based on the personal, family and financial situations, and tax laws, in effect at the time it was created. All of these will change over time, and your plan needs to change with them. It’s a good idea to review your plan every couple of years or so and make sure it still does what you want it to do. Your attorney will let you know when a tax law change might affect your plan, but you need to let your attorney know about other changes that could affect it.

Online and Do-It-Yourself (DIY) Estate Planning

With the number of online and do-it-yourself (DIY) legal providers continuing to grow, some of individuals may be wondering if they could do their estate planning themselves. The advertising is seductive: attorneys use similar forms, the cost is significantly less than hiring an attorney, and many of these websites and kits are created by attorneys. In addition, most people think their estates are not complicated, and many think they are just as smart as (or smarter than) professionals.

Most professionals know that DIY estate planning can be very dangerous. While completing the forms may seem easy and straightforward, a single mistake or omission can have far reaching complications that only come to light after the person has died. With that person not here to explain his or her intentions, the heirs could end up disappointed and confused, and could end up paying much more in legal help to try to sort things out after the fact than it would have cost in the first place.

Those contemplating the DIY route should consider the following:

• Legal Expertise: Experienced estate planning attorneys have the technical expertise to draft documents correctly. Yes, they may use pre-drafted forms to start from, but they know what to change and how to change it to make your plan work the way you want. They also understand the technical terms and legal requirements in your state. Laws vary greatly from state to state, and a DIY program or kit may not tell you everything you need to know to prevent your plan from being thrown out by the court.

• Counseling: Attorneys are called “counselors at law” for a reason. Most estate planning attorneys have counseled many families and they have seen the results of proper and improper planning. An experienced attorney can guide you with delicate decisions, including who should be the guardian of your minor children; how to provide for a child or elderly parent who has special needs without interrupting valuable government benefits; how to provide for your children fairly (which may not be equally); and how you can protect an inheritance from creditors and irresponsible spending.

• Explanation of Intentions: If there is any confusion as to what your intentions were after you are gone, the attorney who counseled you will be able to explain them. This unbiased interpretation from someone who does not stand to benefit from your plan can help to avoid costly litigation by your beneficiaries and even maintain the validity of your documents.

• Coordination of Assets: A will only controls assets that are titled in your name. You probably have other assets that are controlled by a contract, joint ownership and/or beneficiary designations; these include IRAs, 401(k)s, joint bank accounts, real estate and life insurance. A will does not control these assets. An experience estate planning attorney will know how to coordinate these so that your assets are distributed the way you want to those you want to have them.

• Tax Planning: The federal estate tax exemption has been a moving target in recent years. Also, many states have their own death or inheritance tax, often at much lower exemptions than the federal tax. Careful professional planning is a must in order to avoid paying too much federal and/or state tax.

• Same Sex and Other Relationships: Because laws are frequently changing and vary greatly from state to state, it is vital to have updated advice from a competent professional. Without proper planning, many rights may be limited for unmarried cohabitants. Providing for your pets may also be very important to you.

• Complexity and Cost: Most people think their estate planning will be simple. But the reality is, most of us discover we do need some personalized planning…and you may not know that without the guidance and counseling of an experienced attorney. It is far better to spend a little more now and make sure your plan is created correctly than to try to save a few dollars and have things turn out badly later. You won’t be around then to straighten things out. Don’t you think you owe it to those you love to do this the right way?

Here are some things all of us can do to help keep costs down:

• Become educated consumers. The more we learn and understand about estate planning, the less time an attorney will need to spend educating us as to the process.

• Prepare a list of assets and liabilities; gather relevant documents (deeds, titles, beneficiary designations, etc.); consider beneficiaries and any special needs they may have.

• Shop around a bit. Ask friends and acquaintances for referrals. If costs are a concern, let the attorney know up front that you are concerned about costs; he/she may be willing to work with you to keep them as low as possible.

• Consider what you think you want, but be open to the attorney’s suggestions.

Blended Families Underscore the Need for Estate Planning

While anyone with children or modest assets should seriously consider some minimal estate planning, the increasing number of blended families underscores the need for proper estate planning.

Blended families can involve children from a prior marriage as well as joint children, sometimes jokingly referred to as “his, hers and theirs.” Blended families involve both younger and older couples.

When the new spouse is significantly younger, this sometimes means that the older spouse’s children are close in age to the younger. These relationships can cause more than friction between the step-parent and step-children.

Most parents want to ensure that their separate assets will pass to their children, not their stepchildren. However, absent good estate planning, there is no guarantee that their children will inherit their assets. In fact, if the couple creates common “I love you” wills such that their assets pass to the survivor of them, there is a significant likelihood their children will be totally disinherited.

This is because all of their assets will pass to the surviving spouse to do with as he or she pleases. More often than not this means excluding the stepchildren, who then receive nothing.

The fact that Americans are living longer, and sometimes remarrying much later in life, means that blended family issues come into play there too. A recent USA Today article, titled With more blended families, estate planning gets ugly, highlights some of these issues. (The full article is available online at

As this article states, “[a]dd the gaping generational divide between Depression-era parents, who valued frugality above all else, and their Baby Boomer children, who relish self-reward, and the dynamics can be explosive.”

Thus, baby boomer children expecting an inheritance may have to wait much longer than expected. But perhaps more difficult, who should pay for the cost of the surviving spouse’s care? Should the stepchildren be forced to use their inheritance to pay for an aging step-parent’s care, particularly after only a short-term marriage? Or should this burden fall on the children?

There is no one right answer here, but these questions epitomize the many questions that arise with blended families. These questions should be answered with the help of counsel and proper planning.